Everything gets better ;)

One often wonders why women find it difficult to leave a relationship that is emotionally or sometimes even physically damaging to them. As for me, I rely solely on the relationship to make me feel good. I had the misconception that the relationship is giving me 'security' & 'self-worth'. I thought that 'relationship' is where I can gain confidence and feel good--- but in fact, I feel bad. It is always the great cause of my discomfort, stress & unhappiness.

It’s been a while… I now feel fine. I always believed though, that it will just be hard at the start but it will always get better. Ayt?! Agree?! Yes, for sure. I realized that I can’t afford to lose myself. I have a kid. I will always hang on to my values… I know myself. I know what I want, what I need & what I’ve always believed in. Time is gold. We should make the most out of it…

I've learned that approaching a relationship with too much expectations is not only futile but achieves the opposite effect. “It increases his defensiveness, rigidity, distrust and resistance. The single most important principle to deal with the person according to how he actually is, instead of how you are or how you wish he would or think he should be...” You can wait for improvement and if there's none, that's the time you have to assume there's something wrong going on. We grew up in different worlds. We have learned to accommodate different sets of expectations We always have a choice. We should tolerate it. Let go if we feel we have to. The wisest move is the change that comes from yourself.

Let go. I know I should still give my self a chance to be happy even though it means letting go of something “seemingly good”. Actually, it’s something “I thought/akala” good, but then… again… wrong choice. Wahaha!

I've already admitted to myself that it is a bad relationship & accepted the situation. I don't feel like “sayang”. I believe that it’s better to have those times or years wasted than to have my entire life being wasted with someone who doesn’t deserve me…”. "Don't be scared to find anyone else who will love you because you will when the time is right...”.

I want to rest, wahahaha! Tama na muna! When I saw “Ken” (My former crush, na crush ko ulet! Wahahaha!), I realized that there's so many good things that life is yet to offer me. I know I deserve only the best. I still have my life I should thank for. My happiness doesn't depend on somebody. It's my choice... and it will always will.